Possessed: The Boy Who Cries Wolf Blood.

15-year old Calvino Inman is just like any other 15 year old boy. Except he's possessed by the devil and cries tears of blood. BURN HIM WITH FIRE! Now I'm not saying this a hoax, but I am saying I caught Calvino siphoning red food coloring up his ass (strictly by accident, I swear). DUM DUM DUM! Book 'em, Danno.

Thanks to leftRIGHTleft, who has to remind herself how to walk or she gets all tripped up.

Source: Geekologie.com

HOLY NOMs!: Jesus Appears In Kit Kat Bar.

On Good Friday (OLD, LATE, YOU SUCK GW!) Jesus revealed himself in the form of a half-eaten Kit Kat bar. Because, well, the son of God hates Twix. As you can see in those deliciously crispy layers, the Lord's face looks eerily similar to that on the shroud of Turin (Sunday school, son, TA-DOW!). However, the divine bar is not without it's hell-burning naysayers.

Other witnesses were less impressed. "It looks more like Darth Vader," said one.
Really -- Darth Vader? Now why on earth would Darth Vader appear in a damn Kit Kat bar? The man only likes dark chocolate. Get it, because of The Dark Side? Haha, I don't either! Mary Jane FTW!

Sweet Jesus, his face is in a choc [thesun]

Thanks to Richie-Con-Carne and ash, who both agree they should replace communion wafers with Kit Kats.

Source: Geekologie.com

December 25th, a baby boy was born, his name was Jesus.

“Of all things of heaven and earth of which we bear testimony, none is so
important as our witness that Jesus, the Christmas child, condescended to
come to earth from the realms of His Eternal Father, here to work among men
as healer and teacher, our Great Exemplar. And further, and most important,
He suffered on Calvary’s cross as an atoning sacrifice for all mankind. At
this time of Christmas, this season when gifts are given, let us not forget
that God gave His Son, and His Son gave His life, that each of us might have
the gift of eternal life.”

'Tis The Season: Beer Bottle Christmas Trees

With Jesus' surprise roller-skating party just a week away, I thought I'd spread some holiday drunkeness in the form of beer bottle Christmas trees. This first one is made from 1,050 bottles, and there's a video after the jump of a Heineken tree with over 2,000. Also, I added a video of some drunkard making a Jagermeister tree out of a big piece of plywood and airplane bottles. It's amazing the time and effort people put into these things. A thousand bottles, 200 lights, 60 man-hours of labor, and one drunk Geekologie Writer to bring it all crashing down. Feliz cumpleaños, Jesus! And tell Santa I'll post nudey pics of Mrs. Claus if he pulls that coal shit again this year.